Finding the Words – Cape Town

finding the words

Imagine sitting at a tiny little cafe, looking out and seeing this view.

A field of warm green grass, hedged in by a field of lavender, with the Atlantic Ocean lapping at the base of the mountain half a mile away.  The sprinklers were going, throwing rainbow mist across the patio, and wild peacocks wandered between the tables, hoping to eat a discarded croissant or cookie.  Sitting there and drinking my coffee, for the first time in my life, I really had the thought – This must be what heaven looks like. 

I just don’t have the words.  

I had this grand idea that I was going to go to Cape Town, then come back with these amazing stories to tell.  And I did.  And I do.

But I just don’t have the words yet.  All my stories are still wrapped up in these swirling ideas that haven’t quite coalesced into actual sentences that move from one to the next.  I know what this moment or that moment felt like, but I don’t even know where to begin with actually sharing those thoughts and experiences with other people.

It. Was. Amazing. 

We can at least start there. Every day was full of brand new “Oh my gosh, I’ve never done this before!” moments, just one right after the other like this endless string of melodies that I’ve recorded but can’t sing back to anyone just yet.

I ate bread for the first time in a few years.  Fish. (My nearly-vegan ways deserted me pretty much as soon as I got off the plane!)  Alli & I didn’t have to rush in all of our conversations.  I watched my very first episode of the train wreck that is “Toddlers & Tiaras”.  (Yes, my fabulous LA people – that is one of the shows we export to the rest of the world. Gotta love it.)  I wore sandals every day while I was there – and the dust clung to my feet everywhere I went.  The sunlight is a different color there, thanks to being pretty much as far south as you can go on the planet without requiring a phD and a snowsuit a foot thick.  I love South Africa. I love the accents.  I love that everyone hugged me straight away before saying, “Hi.  Who are you?  Welcome!”  I loved living daily life with Alli again.  It felt like no time had passed at all.  This trip turned my world upside down in such a beautiful, heart-wrenching way.

I am different.  The world is different. 

If I can barely put into words all of the brilliantly fun experiences, how am I ever going to share the hardest experiences?  I live in LA, where we really don’t deal with the specter of extreme poverty and even death every single day.  All of my photos from my trip are gorgeous.  But they really only tell half the story.

And I’m getting to a point where I’m finally going to be able to share the second half of my trip with all of you.

Stay tuned…

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